Manfred's Adventures in Parenting
by VideoGameTaco
Summary: Manfred has a two year old baby girl named Franziska. He has to raise her. Alone. Manfred VonKarma. AN: Genre mostly humor but I guess it could be family as well. Might make another if people are interested. *EDIT : Changed Franziska to be two years old instead of one to line up with Edgeworth's arrival to the VonKarma mansion, and italicized things that needed to be italicized.


**DISCLAIMER**

**The Ace Attorney series belongs to Capcom and is in no way affiliated with me whatsoever.**

**The following is a fanwork.**

**Please support the official release.**

* * *

"Speak... Speak... Speak." Manfred VonKarma sat on is leather sofa, with perfect posture might I add, with his two year old daughter in his lap. "You shall speak to your papa at once!" Manfred had been quite frustrated and irritated the past two years his Franziska was born. He knew she wouldn't do that much immediately, but still. She was just so... Imperfect.

All she did was sit there and stare at him. She didn't reply or respond when she was spoken to, she couldn't walk with perfect posture for she couldn't walk at all, and she was just so chubby. _Baby_ _fat_ _is_ _very_ _imperfect_. Manfred thought. "No matter. That problem will resolve itself once you learn to walk."

...

"Speak!"

Franziska started to cry at this point. "What is it now, child? Are you hungry? Why don't we feed you some lunch, then." He carried the baby to his kitchen, fully stocked and balanced out between all the food groups, excluding anything greasy or containing sugar. Aside from cereal that is. He was raising two children.

He dug through the pantry. "Crackers? No. Potatoes? No. Tea? No - where is the oatmeal? I know for a fact I put it in the pantry!" Perhaps Miles had eaten it. He shouldn't have. He had eaten lunch already, and if he had eaten it all then he shouldn't have still been hungry. He had served the perfect amount of macaroni and cheese and the perfect amount of milk.

"Miles!" Miles walked down the stairs to the kitchen. "Yes, Mr. VonKarma?" "Did you eat the last of the oatmeal?" Miles was silent for a moment. He had eaten the oatmeal, but he didn't want to say. He never knew if it was pro or con with Manfred VonKarma. "Well? Did you?" "...Yes." "Manfred gave an annoyed grunt and started to pace back and forth.

"Is... Something wrong?" "Quite frankly, yes. Oatmeal was the only food we had to feed Franziska and she's hungry. Now what am I ..." He wasn't really talking to Miles anymore, he was actually starting to walk away down the hall and was talking to himself now. Miles didn't get the hugeness of the situation. It probably had something to do with 'perfect' Manfred was always trying to teach him. He shrugged and went back upstairs.

"Wait, we have potatoes, right? Stay," He sat Franziska down on the couch in the living room and started back to the kitchen. He grabbed butter and a potato and put the potato in a pot. After cooking it for a while he mashed and buttered it and voila! Food perfect for an infant to consume.

He walked back to where he had left his child. Guess what/who wasn't there? One of Manfred's law books but Miles takes them to read them. Guess what/who else wasn't there? Franziska wasn't sitting on the couch where Manfred had left her. "Oh no." Take note that the VonKarma Mansion of Germany was one of the most expensive (a.k.a largest) in all of Germany. Meaning he might have to go on some wild goose- "AHHHHHH!" Nevermind. Miles found her.

Manfred ran upstairs to Miles's room and went inside. Miles was standing shocked just inside the doorway. The baby was sitting in the center of the room holding one of Miles's folders with the papers all over the floor. She had the classic _did_ _I_ _do_ _something_ _wrong?_ baby face on. "She dumped all my papers!" Miles ran and picked her up, handed her to Manfred and started to pick up his papers to put back into his backpack.

Manfred was very frustrated, and now exhausted. He took Franziska downstairs, fed her the potatoes, and by the time she was full, she was filthy. "Let's run you a bath. When food is in your mouth, you swallow it," Manfred ran Franziska a bath and placed her inside the tub. "Take this bar of soap and cleanse yourself." He then left to read a book or something. Anything to calm his nerves.

A few minutes later, he heard Miles from upstairs. "Mr. VonKarma? You know Franziska's in the bathtub alone, right?" Manfred replied back. "Of course I do, I'm the one who put her in there. Now stop invading her privacy." "But, she doesn't know how to bathe herself. She's just a baby." Manfred ran to the bathroom and sure enough, Miles was right. "She's not any cleaner than twenty minutes ago!" Miles replied as if it was the obvious answer, and it was. "That's because you, as a father, must help her. That's how she'll learn."

So Manfred cleaned Franziska and dressed her and brought her to bed. "You are a very troublesome child." She was placed in her crib and tucked into bed. "Good night, Franziska." in which she replied, "Papa!" Manfred was very shocked. "Your first words! Papa... The perfect first words."

Maybe she _would_ grow up to be perfect.


End file.
